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Dating questions

6 Frequently Asked Second Date Questions Answered

Congratulations. You’ve made it past the first date and reckon you are both attracted to one another. It’s time to set up and show up to the second date.

But what should you do? When should you organise it? Where should you go? Should you kiss her?

This torrent of questions runs through most guys’ minds when they contemplate a second date.

Below are some answers to help ease your mind. (more…)

Second date on scooter

When Should You Set Up a Second Date?

Hi Ed,

I recently matched a girl from Bumble and we went on a first date last Friday. It’s now Sunday and I haven’t heard from her since. What should I do next? We seemed to have a connection on the date and the conversation flowed freely. We didn’t kiss but there seemed to be chemistry. I can’t understand why she hasn’t messaged, and I don’t know when I should set up the second date.

Any advice?

Phil

Thanks for the question, Phil.

First up, congratulations on your first date. Although you haven’t given enough information for me to go on, I hope you followed my first date blueprint. Either way, it sounds like you had fun and got on well with her.

You ask why she hasn’t contacted you even though you sensed a connection.

Guess what? She may be sitting there thinking the exact same thing! Why hasn’t this amazing guy got in touch with me?

As the man, it is your role to lead, especially in the early stage of dating. And therefore it is your job to initiate plans for the second date, even if you are unsure of whether she wants one. (more…)

Men and women differences

Why I Believe The Hookup Culture Exists And How to Deal With It

Swipe through enough online dating profiles and you’ll see plenty of women exclaiming ‘No hookups!’.

Men rarely, if ever, write this.

Hookup culture (people meeting up for casual encounters) is supposedly happening because of dating apps like Tinder, Happn and Bumble.

I don’t agree.

Men and women love sex equally. And according to evolutionary biologists men are programmed to be promiscuous and women to want longer term partners.

There’s another theory women also like a variety or partners, but social convention and fear of judgement has forced them to adapt and be content with one primary partner.

Regardless of which theory is true, I firmly believe the stereotypical 30 year old man is more willing to engage in casual sex than a 30 year old woman is. (more…)

make her feel special

How to Make a Woman Feel Special Whilst Dating

Whilst dating it’s important you make the woman you are with feel special.

It’s often not grand gestures that make me feel fantastic. It’s the smallest things someone does for you that lets you know they care about you.

Making her feel special doesn’t have to mean buying her expensive gifts or making over blown romantic gestures costing a lot of money.

Sometimes all it takes to make her feel special is acting a certain way towards her. It’s about making her feel appreciated, and better yet, appreciated for the things that make her different to all the other women in the world. (more…)

Couple on bridge

Does Dating Advice Promote Manipulation of Women by Men?

The majority of articles I write focus on the first few weeks of dating and the lead up to first sex.

I don’t do this because I want to teach men how to sleep with as many women as possible, to ‘trick’ women into bed, or because sex is the most important part of a relationship.

Quite the contrary.

My philosophy is about teaching men to build MEANINGFUL relationships (whatever type of relationship that may be) with women where both parties respect, trust and care for each other.

I concentrate on the initial interactions because it is the most challenging phase for men, and where they make costly mistakes. Making mistakes means the guy gets rejected before he ever has the chance to build any form of connection. (more…)

christopher ryan sexual omnivores

Are Humans Designed to be Sexual Omnivores?

Christopher Ryan is the author of Sex at Dawn, a book investigating the evolution of mating strategies of men and women.

In 2013 he gave a TED talk entitled ‘Are We Designed to Be Sexual Omnivores‘, embedded below.

In the talk he argues the classic oppositional monogamous relationship model, where women promise fidelity and in return men provide safety and shelter, is a relatively recent invention, beginning around 10,000 years ago due to advancements in agriculture.

In the 200,000 years prior we lived in hunter gatherer groups, where overlapping sexual relationships were a more successful mating strategy to ensure survival of the tribe. (more…)

first date advice

8 Pieces of Dating Widsom I Agree With

I’m always weary of dating articles. Many are written by people with no real-world experience, re-hashing the same old advice that has been around for years, doesn’t work, and is too abstract to put into practise.

So when I stumbled across an article written by The Unknown Don on SoSuave.com titled ‘Sharing 25 Years of Dating Wisdom‘ I read with interest. I was delighted to see such a rock solid list of sage dating advice, written by someone who is older, and clearly knows what it takes to be successful with women.

I highly encourage you to read the entire list of 33 points, but wanted to comment on those that resonate strongly with me, my methods of coaching, and what have had the greatest impact on my success with women. (more…)

The Three Types of Men in Her World

Women classify men into three categories: Friend, Boyfriend, and Lover.

Imagine three concentric circles, like an archery target. The Largest circle represents the Friend zone, the middle circle the Boyfriend zone, and the inner circle the Lover zone.

archery-targetThe Friend zone holds all men with whom she has no sexual attraction. These can be close friends, colleagues, or acquaintances. She in no way gets excited, aroused or turned on in their presence.

The Boyfriend zone contains either a current boyfriend (in a typical monogamous relationship) or men she’s met who are potential boyfriends.

The final circle, containing just one or two men, is the Lover zone. This area is reserved for the guy who does not have the right qualities to be a boyfriend, but turns her on at a primal level, and she is having sex with.

(more…)

buying gift on first date

Why You Shouldn’t Buy Her A First Date Gift

A female friend once told me a story about a first date with a guy she met online.

He stood waiting outside a bar as she approached him. From a distance she immediately knew he wasn’t her type.

He was dressed in the most unfashionable, mish-mashed outfit possible. It appeared as though he had rampaged through a charity shop for middle aged men and grabbed the brightest coloured garments he could find.

(Take note, fashion can be an instant attraction killer and sink your chances before the date has even begun)

She walked up to him and he introduced himself. His voice was high and raspy, the kind everyone puts on when impersonating an uber-geek.

(more…)